Previously On Lanky Goes Forth !
With the start of the Penultimate week of my working life in England being Just hours away , And being it`s Fathers day my thoughts are dominated to the most painful part of this path I now walk .
Knowing I am going to have to say goodbye to my two beautiful daughters, Jane and Mary , was never going to be easy for any of us but especially for them. Jane is 9 yrs and Mary 15 yrs age and they both live with their mother, Samantha, who I was married to for nearly 13 years ending some 5 yrs ago with a divorce , a very bitter divorce .
For Samantha that bitterness has remained with her to this day and it would be very fair of me to say bitterness has festered into nastiness on her part. Now even though all that nastiness is aimed in my direction, and delivered with some venom, what Samantha is totally oblivious to is that it`s Jane and Mary who are being hurt by her almost lust for the need to hurt me . Samantha doesn’t even recognize the fact that I `ve become immune to her venom, I feel , I now know the real Samantha better than she really knows herself , .
Jane and Mary have a given ” Right” to be shielded from 100 % of all the crap that they have ,unashamedly, for Samantha , been exposed to . No child should have to hear any adult let alone their mother shout ” You’re a Crap Father” ” “I hate you The Kids hate you” before slamming the phone down for any reason what so ever. What caused her to do that by the way was the fact that I called to inform her I would be 15 minutes late in picking them up for their weekend stay with me which happened or was supposed to happen every other weekend ,. I`ll say at this point Samantha is not here to defend herself however I felt it right to give one example of her actions and I could give you a whole bunch more 5 yrs worth in fact but it`s only purpose here is for you to be able to have some understanding of events.
Even if things were as they should be with a divorced family this would still be painful but it has to be said somewhat easier than I know somebody is going to allow it to be . My pain comes from the fact no matter how much I try to reassure them of the love I have for them and that will never change , and that of my plans being put in place for contacting them, everything I can and should be doing ,will be sabotaged at every attempt . It`s already happening and I`m powerless to stop the pain..
I`ve tried to keep detail to a bare minimum The full story is by no means irrelevant , in fact , it`s very relevant , However this is not intended to be an account of my life history it is simply a Journal of my experiences and thoughts as I go Forth into the future that awaits me .. Names are all fictitious however the facts are the facts as happened .. I`m sorry for any unanswered questions I may have left you with . Thank you For Reading